- Listen deeply. Try to understand where the speaker is coming from and why they are saying what they are saying.
- Be present. Give the speaker your undivided attention. Put down your phone, turn away from the screen, put away other thoughts. Your attention is a gift.
- Make an effort to understand. Communication is bi-directional. Try restating what you heard.
- Be non-judgmental (skillful). Dispense with assessing if you or they are right or wrong.
- Don’t make it personal. It’s not about you. It’s not about your identity. It’s about what you are each trying to accomplish.
- Exercise non-attachment. Recognize neither of you are what you say; there is no permanent self attached.
From Secular Buddhism with Noah Rasheta (#72 – Yanny or Laurel? A Lesson in Mindful Communication)